I'm not a firm believer on trying to change yourself just because it's a new year...
If you really, really need that as motivation to change something that everyone hates about you, just stop and David Carridine yourself (FATALITY). Change because you want too. Not because other people want you too. You're setting yourself up for failure and everyone that wants you to change, is betting against you that you'll still remain the heartless prick that everyone hates.
So save everyone the trouble and make your resolution be that, "In the year 2010, I vow to get 1 year older". Unless you die, you'll win. And if you do die, at least the rest of your friends will absolutely know for sure that you CANNOT keep, to doing anything right. See ya in hell, suckers.
The thing I hate about the holidays is all the pointless shit people do. Example: Getting 42 texts saying, "Merry Christmas". Is that really suppose to brighten my day? A fucking forward that every, lazy, pretend friend sends as well wishings for the holiday? That's worse than receiving a fruit cake from some non existent family member. So if you're that guy, vow in 2010 to not do that. I'd rather not have a message from you, so I can assume your dead and not have to worry about sending that fruit cake to your parents house.
"Ooo....Did someone say....cake.......and dick?"
This also applies to those who accomplish this on Facebook, MySpace or any other social type of networking thing...
which comes to people who update online status' in the 1st Person.
"Generic Named Person thinks masterbating with mayonaise is phenomenal. " Don't do that, (no...not the beating off with mayo part, I heard it's divine). I'm sure people already assume, that you are personally updating your status, with your own thoughts. I would want to believe that there aren't dumbfuck people who have to question if your update was about you, or if those thoughts happen to be of some random person but I've been proven wrong before. You're not, Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson.
The only people who can get away with this are the mentally handicapped kids back in high school that thought they were WWE wrestlers. Why, they would have a Facebook, I dunno. I'm sure their updates would be, "Danny Chonger lkjsssl; jksljd poop cookys hhH the gme tim 2 pay teh gme".
But nevertheless, they would have insane battles with each other at lunch and challenge any other MHMR kids to title matches. And if that didn't squash their beef, they would go to the restroom to have Penis Sword Fights. True story.
Douchebag McGee is climbing a big piece of shit named, the Rock.
People that should never change are: Cholos, Guidos, Juggalos and people that wear Ed Hardy. I say this because if you ever need someone to make fun of, there's always one of them around.
Whitest looking black dudes ever.
No explanation needed.
See ya's in the 2010 people. Be safe.
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